"Sh*t My Dad Says" by Justin Halpern. Non-fiction.
As the title
might indicate this is an obscenity-laced little (158 page) book that is refreshing
and hilarious. It’s PC to speak thus-and-so but it is also duplicitous if you
are thinking or acting otherwise. Justin Halpern’s father lectures on Nuclear Medicine
to oncologists at UCSD but his vocabulary, frankness and delivery at home are
straight from the hardscrabble Kentucky farm he was raised on:
ON CANDY
“Jesus
Christ, one fucking Snickers bar, and you’re turning around like your asshole
is on fire. Okay, outside you go. Don’t come back in until you are ready to
sleep or shit.
ON THE RIGHT
TIME TO HAVE CHILDREN
“It’s never
the right time to have children, but it’s always the right time for screwing.
God’s not a dumbshit. He knows how it works.
ON MY SIXTH
GRADE PARENT-TEACHER CONFERENCE
“I don’t
think that teacher likes you, so I don’t like her. You ding off more shit than
a pinball, but goddammit, you’re a good kid. She can go fuck herself.”
And so on….
Inspired by
Justin’s wildly popular webpage this book is more than a string of salty
anecdotes. A story arc (that ends with the publication of this book) is
uncovered and an honest, unorthodox, idiosyncratic but ultimately successful
way of raising children is revealed. And Justin, the child and target of most
of these expletive-filled lessons appreciates—as a grown-up—all the love
lurking behind the obscenities.
Impressive sh*t.
Enjoy the
book.
Rob Loughran's 24th book "Walmart to Wolf House: Sonoma County Essays" is available in paperback and ebook now.
